


Poisonous

by starr_falling



Series: February Ficlets [16]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:28:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29505513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starr_falling/pseuds/starr_falling
Summary: Bilbo and Thorin discover an important difference between hobbits and dwarrow.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Series: February Ficlets [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2139438
Comments: 4
Kudos: 124





	Poisonous

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompt: poisonous. If you hover over the Khuzdul words, a translation should pop up. You can also find the translations in the end notes.

Bilbo was puttering around his private kitchen, cleaning up after dinner. Thorin hadn’t been able to join him but had promised to be home by supper. Bilbo still found it disconcerting how infrequently dwarrow ate and how frequently they skipped meals in favor of work.

“Bilbo,” Thorin called.

“In the kitchen,” Bilbo called back. Thorin appeared in the doorway, crown already discarded for the day. “You’re earlier than I was expecting.”

“The meeting was canceled,” Thorin said as he crossed over to Bilbo. “Someone misplaced the relevant documents.”

“Seems rather inconsiderate,” Bilbo huffed as he turned toward his husband, “making you work so late and then not even being prepared.”

“Hmm,” Thorin hummed as he leaned down to kiss Bilbo. “True, but it means I will have longer to spend with my darling husband, so I can’t complain.”

“You may have a point there,” Bilbo conceded as he kissed Thorin before resuming cleaning. “Do you have any requests for supper? Do you need something to tide you over?”

“I’m fine,” Thorin said as he leaned against the counter out of the way. He watched Bilbo as he bustled around. He didn’t speak again until Bilbo moved a vase to wipe down the table. “Bilbo, where did those come from?”

“Hmm, oh, those,” Bilbo looked at the clusters of small white flowers with a smile. “I found some wild parsnip. It might seem silly to keep flowers from a vegetable, but it looks very like wild carrot, and my father was always fond of them.”

“Did you eat any of the root?” Thorin was suddenly right next to him. He gripped Bilbo’s shoulders tightly. “Did you?”

“What are you going on about?” Bilbo asked. He raised his own hands to grip Thorin’s shirt. “What does it matter if I ate it?”

“That isn’t wild parsnip. It’s water hemlock,” Thorin said and clutched Bilbo to his chest for a moment before setting him back. “It’s extremely poisonous. I’ll send for Óin straight away.”

“Poisonous?” Bilbo asked, following Thorin as he strode towards the doors of their quarters. “What are you on about?”

Before Thorin could leave the sitting room, Bilbo darted in front of him. Thorin halted but frowned down at Bilbo.

“Please, Bilbo, time is of the essence,” Thorin said. “The poison is powerful and doesn’t take long to take effect. We must send for – no, there is no time. We will go to Óin.”

“We’re not going anywhere until you explain to me what is going on,” Thorin made a disagreeable sound. “I ate the parsnips or hemlock or whatever it was two days ago. Clearly, whatever has gotten you in a snit hasn’t happened.”

“Two days?” Thorin asked, eyes wide. “And you haven’t been sick?”

“No, I haven’t been,” Bilbo said. “Now come sit down and calm yourself.”

Thorin allowed Bilbo to lead him over to a pair of armchairs in front of the fireplace. He pushed Thorin into one before crawling into his lap.

“Now that you can see for yourself that I’m fine,” Bilbo said as Thorin curled his arms around him, “could you please explain what’s got you so upset.”

“I don’t know how it is possible,” Thorin said as he held Bilbo close, “but I am glad you are alright.”

“Thorin,” Bilbo sighed. “Please, you’re frightening me.”

“I’m sorry, ghivashel, but I am rather frightened myself,” Thorin said. “Water hemlock is extremely poisonous to dwarrow. I assumed it would be the same for hobbits. I am so very grateful it is not.”

“You said that before,” Bilbo huffed. “But you still haven’t explained what you mean.”

“I’m not sure what part you wish me to explain?” Thorin asked. He shifted Bilbo around to look him in the eye.

“The part where you thought I could be poisoned by eating a plant,” Bilbo would have thrown his hands up in frustration. Still, even as much as Thorin was annoying him, he didn’t want to accidentally hit him.

“I thought it because it is what happens to dwarrow that eat water hemlock,” Thorin spoke slowly as if trying to work something out. Bilbo suspected they were talking at cross purposes.

“Dwarrow can get sick? From eating a plant?” Bilbo asked slowly. Thorin nodded. “Are you sure about that?”

“Yes, they can even die if it’s the right, or rather, the wrong plant,” Thorin said. “Such as water hemlock. Does that not happen to hobbits?”

“Of course not!” Bilbo hopped out of Thorin’s lap so he could gesticulate without fear. “I can’t imagine dying from eating. It’s ridiculous.

“It sounds like something Ori would make up to get out of eating his greens,” Bilbo narrowed his eyes as he swung around to face Thorin. “Are you _really_ sure about this?”

“I once witnessed a Man die after eating the wrong mushroom,” Thorin said solemnly. “It was not – pleasant.”

The look on Thorin’s face wasn’t pleasant either. Bilbo had to accept what he was saying, no matter how strange and impossible it seemed.

“No wonder you lot aren’t fond of greens, if they can kill you,” Bilbo could feel himself paling. “I could have killed someone with my cooking!”

“That did not happen,” Thorin soothed. “And first thing in the morning, we will see about educating you on poisonous plants, so it never will happen.”

“Oh dear,” Bilbo said, an old memory suddenly taking on new significance. “I wonder if that’s what happened to that unpleasant Man that mother insisted on feeding even though he was rather rude to father?”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for the fantastic Khuzdul resources goes to [The Dwarrow Scholar](https://dwarrowscholar.wordpress.com/), and [khuzdul4u.tumblr.com](http://khuzdul4u.tumblr.com/).
> 
> ghivashel - treasure of treasures  
> 


End file.
